Finally, and All-Star Game worth watching

I’m not a huge fan of All-Star games, I’ll be perfectly honest. I watched the Pro Bowl, and I enjoyed it simply because it was a game of football to watch. But it’s sloppy football, only salvaged by the fact that most of my favorite players were all playing in the same game (and that my Fantasy Football team filled out about half of the rosters!). The MLB All-Star game is even worse. In fact, even with the added weight of awarding home-field advantage to the side that wins for the World Series, it still is a sleeper of a game. I like what the NHL has done in recent years (well, not last year, but…) with the North America vs. the World teams. This seems to have added some flare and competitive spirit to the game. But few people care about NHL Hockey, as sad or wrong as that may be.

And then there’s the NBA All-Star Game. There’s something different about this one. Besides featuring most of the best players in the game, the NBA All Star game has the added benefit of it being a basketball game. Deep, I know… What I mean by that is that basketball, unlike any other sport has showmanship as a very intrinsic part of its appeal. This is the sole reason the And 1 Tour is so successful. It isn’t GOOD basketball, but it’s FUN basketball. The combination of dunks, fancy passes and one-on-one matchups not only make basketball great, but also make it possible for a game of basketball to be watched and enjoyed, even when the end result is insignificant.

It’s hard to watch a baseball game, or a football game, or a hockey game and not care about who wins. You probably really enjoy watching a monster homerun, a great one-timer or watching a 50 yard pass being thrown and caught by the best quarterbacks and receivers in the world, respectively. But while All-Star games in each of these sports may feature more of these things than your average, or even good game, the difference is not significant. You add a small amount of enjoyment (from the higher frequency of spectacular plays), but you take away a large amount of what makes the games great (the result).

The NBA All-Star game takes away the significance of the result (although by the fourth quarter players are usually playing to win, but that’s actually when the game becomes less entertaining), but it brings more than enough else to the table to make it worth watching, even memorable. I remember watching Eddie Jones be robbed of an All-Star Game MVP Award after he displace amazing around-the-back passes, alley-oop feeds and his own array of spectacular dunks: only to watch Glen Rice (what happened to your career Glen?) get the award for breaking the record for most points in a quarter. It wasn’t that Glen Rice’s accomplishment wasn’t amazing (he put on a great shooting display), but Eddie Jones’ performance was the epitome of what the All-Star game is about; showmanship. His passes, steals and dunks made the fans feel they got their money’s worth.

Who doesn’t remember Tracy McGrady’s off the backboard to himself “alley-oop” dunk a few years ago? And who can forget Vince Carter mirroring and even topping it with a similar, but even more spectacular version of the same dunk the next year. Who can forget a young Kobe Bryant waiving off a pick from Karl Malone while being guarded by Jordan. What about the time Jordan caught a missed free-throw, in mid air and immediately dunked it, all in one fluid motion. Or how about when Isiah Thomas froze Jordan out of the All-Star game, refusing to get him the ball as he ran the offense. How can we forget Jordan’s last All-Star game. He played a terrible game in most regards, as his team force-fed him the ball in the second half (even missing and easy dunk at one point). But then, he slowly started to heat up, hitting some classic turn-around jumpers that reminded us, if even for only a second, how great he had once been, and why a part of us was glad he had come back. In the end his efforts came up short, and we remembered why we were also sad to seem him back. We were sad because we could remember how great Jordan had been, and how his flair for the spectacular had made him great not just in the regular season, but at events like the All-Star game.

Now quick, try to remember at least one memorable event from any of the other All-Star games? The only one that comes to mind for me is Todd Helton hitting a walk-off homer, which I believe came in extra-innings. The fact of the matter is that there was nothing really spectacular about that home run, which didn’t clear the fences by very much. The only reason we remember it at all is because it was the first year the MLB All-Star Game’s decided which League would get home-field in the Series. All-Star games are about the great plays and the great players making them, not outcomes. That’s why I’ll tune into the NBA’s for reasons other than going through withdrawal from a sport in its off-season. Just remember while you’re playing to forget what the score is, and remember the plays and the players who made them.

"Mr. Clutch" vs. "Mr. Right Place at the right time"

The National Football League’s season finale, the Super Bowl, was less than a week ago and I still have football fever coursing through my veins. In fact, what the heck, I think it’s going through my arteries and lymphatics as well. My entire Cardiovascular system is still craving football. I realize that there is in fact “one last, final last game”, otherwise known as the Pro Bowl; but somehow this just doesn’t really satisfy the urge. Although I must admit, some of the Pro Bowl skills competitions always manage to intrigue me, but I can never figure out if they are truly entertaining or I’m just that desperate.

And so, in an effort to keep the feeling alive, I’ve decided to write “one last, final last” football article. As we have all sat through the last few weeks trying to fill the yearly void that the diminishing football schedule has left in our routines, there’s one person who must be feeling it even more than the most ardent of fans. Tom Brady. Well, to be exact, any member of the Patriots who was there for all the title runs; but I’m not writing an article about all of them (although someone should really write an article about the fact that Teddy Bruschi came back from a stroke to play this season). Where was I… oh yeah, Tom Brady really must be missing football right now.

I’m very aware that the Patriots, after their first Super Bowl win managed to miss the playoffs entirely the following season. However, in my opinion, Tom Brady barely missed football that off-season as he attempted to satisfy his urge to be in the spotlight and enjoy his fame. But Brady did learn something that off-season, something that drove him to work as hard as he could to not be left out of the playoffs the next two years: to not be left out of ANY PART of the playoffs.

I don’t buy into a lot of the hoopla that surrounds Mr. Brady. In fact, I think the Partriots run was as much due to the excellence of the entire “Brady Bunch” as it was due to Tom’s excellence at the games most pivotal position. They had a fantastic defense, a coaching STAFF that game-planned extremely well, and a Quarterback who kept you in games, and then always made the one big play you needed. That basically summed up Tom Brady during the Pats’ title runs. He made big plays. Over three Super Bowl runs (notice I won’t use the term dynasty in this article), Tom Brady was a clutch performer. In fact, he’s pretty much earned the right to occasionally borrow Jerry West’s nickname, “Mr. Clutch”.

Take a look at the newly christened champs, the Pittsburgh Steelers. All the same basic factors are there. Great defense (I realize that’s a stretch, but I use the term comparatively to their competition, not to the entire history of the NFL Bears fans)? Check. A coaching staff that game-plans extremely well? Did you watch the playoffs? They flustered the best QB in the NFL , Peyton Manning (it’s not even close, by the way). They made the Denver Broncos look like a very average team. Wait a second, the Broncos WERE a very average team that just took care of business. And in the Super Bowl they tricked the Seahawks into putting the game in Hasselbeck’s hands. I’m no huge Shaun Alexander fan, but he was their bread and butter the whole season, and then suddenly they want to put the entire load on the shoulders and balding head of Matt Hasselbeck? Who do you think the Steelers were more afraid of, Hasselbeck or Shaun Alexander? And no, Jeremy Stevens is not an appropriate answer here. All that to say, you can put a check next to the "game-plans well" section of the Steelers report card...

This leaves us with the one remaining comparative factor between the Patriots and the Steelers; Having a quarterback who keeps you in the game and then always makes the big play when you need it. Hmm… Ben Roethlisberger clutch? Not so much… Who would you take if you had one drive to win the Super Bowl? I’d take Adam Viniaterri, but if I had to choose between these two, I’d go Brady every time.

Don’t take this the wrong way, I like Big Ben. And by Big Ben I mean Big Ben Wallace of the Detroit Pistons. I love his game, and I love his ‘fro. But I like Roethlisberger too. He’s done an admirable job of leading a veteran team as a young QB. And he meets the first part of the criteria; he keeps his team in the game. USUALLY. Throughout the playoffs he actually did a great job of giving his team an early lead and then not giving the ball back to the opposing team. But come time for the big game, Roethlisberger tried to give the game away, just as he did a year ago against both the Jets and the Patriots games. He made bad throw after bad throw. In fact, he only made one really GOOD play the entire game. He made a great play when he acted as if he were going to run, and then stopped just short of the line of scrimmage to throw a huge completion to MVP Hines Ward. But even on that play he made a throw that very well could have been picked off.

Am I insinuating that Ben Roethlisberger is a choke artist? Not really, but can any one out there make a case that he’s a clutch performer? He’s the youngest Quarterback to ever win a Super Bowl, but how much of that had to do with him, instead of with the rest of his team? I mean, Antwan Randel El made the best throw of the Super Bowl, and he hasn’t played QB since his days at Indiana. In a game where someone usually has to play out of their mind to take the MVP award away from the winning QB, Ben’s level of performance made the common thought process go something like this: “Well, Bettis would be the sentimental favorite, but he didn’t do anything. Hines Ward had good yardage and a TD. Well, we CAN’T give it to Roethlisberger… Okay, let’s go Hines Ward, nice guy, hard worker, team player…”

Would the Steelers have won with Tom Brady behind center? You betcha. Would the Patriots have won three Super Bowls in four years with Ben Roethlisberger as their QB? I’m not sure they would have won any… The difference is simple this. With Tom Brady, all you have to do is keep the game close enough that the game is left in his hands come crunch time. With Ben Roethlisberger, you play to keep the fate of the game OUT of his hands.

Give Me a Break

Readers and friends, a terrible atrocity has been brought to my attention. Apparently, Mac had to take a test on Super Bowl Monday. This should never happen to anyone, period. In fact, this has made me decide that we need to seriously re-think how many holidays we need to have. Consider this an open letter to Dick Lecter, the President of Corporate America: We need more holidays. I’d even be ok with getting half pay for some of them, but there are just some times of the year that nobody should have to work. Here’s my list of possible considerations, almost all of which are major call-in/class skip days where nothing gets done:

Super Bowl Monday: The Super Bowl goes beyond a sporting event. It’s a legitimate national event. It needs to have a holiday. Plus, this would pretty much establish that it’s at least occasionally legitimate to call in, take vacation days, or blow off family obligations for a sports-related reason. My take is that it’s only ok for a decisive playoff game, anything you have tickets to, a championship ring day/parade if your team hadn’t won in a while, or any fantasy league draft.

Martin Luther King Day: Apparently in a lot of cities, this actually is a paid holiday. Well, I want in on that. Plus, if any American from the last fifty years deserves to have their own holiday, it’s probably him.

Valentine’s Day: Look, I dislike Valentine’s Day as much as anyone. It’s a depressing day for anyone who’s single and not comfortable with that fact, and it’s downright horrifying for people who have been dating someone for two or three weeks. I’m also at least 70% that it was just made up to sell stuff. But it’d just be a nice day to have off, as established couples could plan some elaborate date, and guys who are happily single could watch the entire Rambo, Die Hard, or Terminator trilogy instead of just one of the movies (I’m watching Rambo, which I actually haven’t seen. Good times. The whole trilogy would have been better, though.)

St. Patrick’s Friday: I have no problem working, or even working late, on St. Patrick’s Day, but it can be pretty difficult to make it to work after observing this holiday properly…

April Fools Day: If only because the temptation to mess with customers and/or co-workers is just too great, and I can’t imagine that would go over too well in most businesses.

Good Friday/Easter Monday: Ok, I realize it may be considered a little bit egocentric to expect a four day weekend for a religious holiday (although nobody has a problem with taking one for Christmas), so as a concession, I will be willing to also take paid time off on Yom Kippur and the first day of Ramadan.

Cinco De Mayo: Actually this might be another one to take the day after off…

Summer: I can’t really think of anyone who would be against this.

Halloween: Just a genuinely fun holiday. I’m sorry, but if you think you’ve matured to the point where you can’t enjoy a day that revolves around wearing costumes, watching scary movies, eating junk food, and playing pranks on people, you need to seriously re-evaluate your life.

There you go. I think that’s pretty reasonable. In fact, I’d even be willing to give up Labor Day and Memorial Day in order to get a few of these, since neither of those mean much to most people aside from being a day off. Until then, I’ll just keep using all of my sick and vacation days every year…

Super Bowl Appetizer: Nachorama style!

Despite that fact that James Exley feels that the entire “Nachorama” article idea is lame, I am presenting a small assortment of appetizing stories. Let’s be honest, no one ever really took Jamie’s opinion seriously did they? That, and despite some very tasting chicken tenders in both Buffalo and Normal varieties, the Nachorama is the Village Tavern’s greatest strength…

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“I’d like to tender my resignation.”

Has there ever been a more confusing series of events in a Professional front office? Earlier this off-season Red Sox’ GM Theo Epstein left what he had always painted as his ‘Dream Job’ citing burnout and lack of personal time as his reasons for leaving. However, people around the sports business speculated that both contract issues, and a personal fall-out between Theo and his mentor Larry Lucchino had led to his growing discontentment with daily interactions that his ‘dream job’ entailed.

Yet strangely enough, come a week or so ago, Theo was back as the head man for Red Sox Nation, trying to replace the incredibly popular Johnny Damon at centerfield. What change? Peace of mind. Theo made a small power play, and he won. He was upset with not having as much authority as he wanted in personnel and business decisions, so he made a bold move. Leave, and at the very worst he would have a handful of other GM jobs to choose from. Win, and he could get back his ‘dream job’, with more power, more respect, probably a new contract, and great trips to Hawaii and South Africa under his belt. Theo won. Don’t be surprised to see a few of the people that had a part in his frustration the first go-round, finding themselves looking for new jobs in the next year or so…

“And while I’m here, would you like to see my Resume?”

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While the Theo situation has been a debacle that I didn’t really see coming, there’s another situation that has gone from being an issue begs questioning, to one that has become a yearly spectacle: is this the end of Brett Favre’s career? What was once a question firmly situated at the back of every Green Bay Packers fans’ minds at the end of each season, has now become a media frenzy of ridiculous proportions. I like Brett Favre. I like the way he has fun playing football, I like that he’s not afraid to take chances. And I love that for years he’s had the ability to make throws that people once thought to be not only ill-advised, but near impossible.

This is all I can tell you about the Brett Favre retirement circus extravaganza. Keep your shirts on, calm down, and don’t bust out the ‘Jump To Conclusions Mats” just yet. The fact of the matter is this; Brett Favre isn’t sure what he’s doing next year, just like he has been unsure for the last 3 or 4 off-seasons. Don’t buy too much into what is said in the upcoming weeks until there is not only a final retirement announcement, but until the coin toss of next years first regular season game has been made, and Favre is not only not in uniform, or on the sidelines, but not even in the stadium, in Green Bay, or anywhere in the state of Wisconsin.

Cause there’s two things you always have to remember about Brett Favre. Just when you think you have him figured out, you don’t, AND this man has the Jordan-esque type competitive nature that will make it almost impossible for him to walk away from the game if he is not being carted off the field by a golf cart and an Athletic Trainer.

Oh yeah, there is one other thing about Brett Favre: to quote ‘Monday Night John’, “You could have 11 Brett Favre’s on the same team, and there’d still only be one Brett Favre!”

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What’s in the water in Anaheim? First, the Angels decide to change their name from the California Angels, to the Anaheim Angels. Then, this season they went from the Anaheim Angels to what is undoubtedly the worst name in sports history (largely because the name makes up an entire sentence in and of itself). ‘The Los Angeles Angles of Anaheim’. Hmmm… so where do they play again? Hell, if your going to actually call them, should they just go back to the California Angels? I mean, you don’t want to be associated with just one city in California, then why not go back to claiming the entire state again?

Well, if the Disney classic taught us anything about our Avian friend the Duck it is this, “Ducks fly together” (Well, that and that there is no one more unstoppable and important move in all of hockey than the triple deke…). Or so we though!

How is this pertinent? Well, as if this one incident wasn’t enough for the identity-crisis-stricken people of Anaheim, earlier this week the Anaheim Mighty Ducks announced that next year they will be dropping the ‘Mighty’ part of their moniker. Was this change inspired by disappointing performance as of late, or in an effort to intimidate their opponents? I mean, a duck, in and of itself is pretty intimidating! Maybe it’s subliminal appeal for all the Monty Python fans out there to support Anaheim’s team. Or maybe there is just something (besides a flock of Ducks, of course) in the water.

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This just in, JEROME BETTIS IS FROM DETROIT!!! Could there have been any more overplayed story at this Super Bowl? I think it’s a great story; you know, to have never been mentioned until the pre-game show when they do a video montage of the entire Pittsburgh team at the Bettis household for a big meal. Nothing more.

I did get a real chuckle out of the whole thing after the AFC Championship game when a reporter ask The Bus what people should be excited about having the Super Bowl in Detroit. His response: “You know, it’s just a great city”. First of all, this is a blatant lie. I’ve been to Detroit. Secondly, is that all you can come up with after all the media hoopla of why you so badly want to get ‘home’ for what is probably (it’s about time) your last game in the NFL? How about, “the people there are great”, or “it just brings back many memories of my childhood”. Anything.


I’m also convinced there is a massive media conspiracy to help the city of Detroit with its image. I really can’t speak against this, the city needs a little love. It’s had some (really) hard times, and I am glad they’ll benefit from the economic benefits of be the Super Bowl host city. But this has been a classic example of people coming in with REALLY low expectations (understandably), and being pleasantly surprised enough to brain wash themselves into thinking the city is nicer than it really is. Whatever works guys, as long as it gives the media something other than Jerome’s homecoming to talk about.

And if we must talk about Jerome Bettis, why has it never been pointed out that it is more than a little ironic that Jerome Bettis’ last game, and first Super Bowl, is “Super Bowl XL”?

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Is there a worst trend in the NBA than the full leg-length tights? I mean, I’m not gonna lie, I have a pair. I wore them for track, when I live in Chicago and I had to run in sub-30º weather while snow was falling. NOT in a temperature controlled NBA arena. There’s a little difference.

The first person I remember doing this was Jerry Stackhouse. Now, I know he’s still playing, but Stack hasn’t been relevant enough as an NBA player in the last few years for me to check up on whether or not he’s still wearing them. I also know that Kobe wore them for a stretch last year I think. Thankfully, the man who once scored 81 points in a game, and has nicknamed himself “Black Mamba”, no longer wears the tights on a regular basis. And now, after wearing them one game for an injury, which subsequently started a nice winning streak, LeBron James is wearing the tights every game. I understand superstitions, but come on!

This is not only the most ridiculous fashion statement I’ve ever seen, but I think the NBA needs to put a stop to it. I understand that with a very minor hamstring, quadriceps, or groin injury, some compression can help prevent further straining the muscle. I’m all for that; wear compression shorts. So, assuming a player maybe has a mild calf injury, wear a compression sleeve on your calf. My point is, if it’s necessary fine, but if not, it shouldn’t be allowed.

My reasons for why the NBA should step in on this are twofold. First of all, it looks ridiculous. I’m sorry, playing indoor basketball in pants has always, and will always look ridiculous. Secondly, and more objectively, how can a league that fines players for not wearing socks that match the color of a players shoes (which are determined by whether they are home or away), as well as fining players for their shorts being too long, tolerate this. On top of gameplay dress code, this is the same NBA which instituted by far the most stringent dress code in all of professional sports this off-season. The tights must go!


Oh yeah, and did you know that Jerome Bettis, playing in his first Super Bowl, and probably his last game, is from Detroit?